How am I with the pandemic going on you ask? Well…
I’ve been wanting to post for so long, but I have so many thoughts in my brain – whilst also being in such a slow paced environment and it feels really weird to do normal day to day stuff at the moment. Is it too insensitive to blog at the moment? Are people bothered? I don’t know. But I thought I’d write for those who want to either hear from someone similar to them or learn from someone from a disabled (high risk) perspective in these uncertain times. Let’s try and put a bit of structure to it so it makes a bit of sense. How am I feeling as a disabled person in this pandemic? Well I flit between…
“The staying inside bit is ok”
We can do this! I’m used to staying inside. I talked about this in my latest post more. But yes, at this stage I feel myself relax and think, really it’s no different we just can’t go out and about and I’m certainly used to having to do that at times
“Oh my god look at the news”
I’ll watch the news and be horrified by what I see, the death rate going up. Then we’re being showed on the news and social media people out and about and we’re flabbergasted. Then there are experts debating this, one person is saying how irresponsible this is, then you have someone else saying we shouldn’t police people and not everyone has a safe home to stay in. Lots of emotions start to build…
“I’ve got all the time to do what I want!”
Once I’ve stopped watching the news I’ll distract myself, and once I’m into that I think – wow I’ve got all this time to do what I enjoy! I could do more blogs, videos and chat to people…
“Wait, I just can’t concentrate”
Yes we have a lot of time now, but who can concentrate properly with all this going on? Not me. I’m constantly worrying about whether the virus will get to me somehow. As a high risker, how will that affect me? How are we going to safely get food and medication?
I’m also reading a lot of stuff at the moment about how ventilators are prioritised depending on who you are, your ‘health’ and situation. There’s a real worry from a lot of us high riskers that we won’t be considered as a priority. Here’s an article with more info if you’re interested in this from Disability Rights UK.
“Let’s call people and play games!”
With this pandemic, zoom has been our number one app hasn’t it. It really is lovely catching up with friends and playing games and has really cheered me up on days I’ve needed it. But I’m not going to lie, some days I really want a zoom-less day too. I do find these calls quite tiring so I’m making sure I don’t do too many a week.
“Do you know what, let’s just watch some TV”
This is probably what I end up doing after going through all of these emotions! I’m finding Netflix really helpful at the moment, even just to have on in the back ground. I’m actually writing a blog coming up with my ultimate Netflix recommendations so stay tuned for that if you need some new shows.
So that’s a peep inside my brain at the moment. I’d say I go through this cycle more than twice a day. So if you’re feeling it too, don’t worry I think most people are. I hope you’re as safe as you can be and actually doing ok. As a lot of people are saying, there’s no right way to deal with this pandemic – just do what you need to.
That was a good read Gem. It’s the feeling of being in a kind of weird neverland that I find difficult on some days (like today). Can’t seem to concentrate so I disappear into a book. Sx